The Anatomy of a Nap Blog

     Is there anything better than a good nap? Chili Cheese Dogs are a close second, but because they usually preface a good nap, they'll always be second place. Nothing that leads to the goal can ever be first.
     There are very few things, no that's an exaggeration, that I'm especially good at doing. In fact, I consider myself a well rounded 'C' student. But when it comes to taking a nap, I'm top shelf. I would consider myself a professional napper. Subsequently, I am indeed qualified to administer advice without using pedantic prose to help you get some slumber even if you feel it might interfere with any of your pre-planned daytime duties.

      In no particular order, here's what you must understand to graduate from novice napper to neophyte to professional like me.
     I think the number one rule about napping is; It's okay to 'rest your eyes.' Of course if you're less than 30-years old, you're plain lazy. But if you have any of the following symptoms, napping is a good and potentially healthy option:

      1) You're older than 45(ish)
      2) You have children & grand children
      3) You have a good chair or couch.... NOT a bed!
      4) It's Sunday or Saturday or cloudy
      5) You have spare time

A Big Lunch = A Good Nap!

     There are better ways to take a nap. Just 'resting your eyes' will always qualify. But if you want a good nap here's my advice.

      1) Eat a giant lunch.... and eat it fast!
      2) Sit still after you eat, preferably in a warm or cold room.
      3) Use that recliner
      4) Get into a routine like, "After lunch, I rest my eyes."
      5) Watch an old movie... One you've seen many times
      6) The Golf Channel...
      7) Mellow music

     In order to take the good nap, I've learned certain things are 'nap killers.'  Here are some of the worst nap interrupters I've encountered but with some simple solutions.

       1) A pesky fly.... Always have a fly swatter handy
       2) The sun.... Close the shades or position your chair accordingly
       3) An unwanted phone call... Unplug the phone
       4) A potty break... Go before closing your eyes
       5) Unexpected visitors... Lock the door & don't answer it.
       6) The yappy dog... Most professional nappers do not have a dog.
     
      When it comes to a good nap, I feel you must remember it's a nap. It's not going to bed. So when you 'rest your eyes' make it clear to all present that you're just 'resting your eyes,' you're not going to bed.

Napping is NOT going to Bed!

       The #1) napping 'don't' is: When you announce that you're just 'resting your eyes,' you're announcing that to folks you actually know. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES  are you to announce 'I'm just resting my eyes' at functions that include strangers nor unfamiliar family members. And remember, you are NEVER to leave the company of your guests to climb back into bed! Sometimes sacrificing a day of 'resting your eyes' is just polite behavior.

     Other napping 'don'ts' are:

      2) Don't take a nap without putting your cell phone on vibrate.... you could wake up other nappers
      3) Don't 'rest your eyes' with still a full plate of chores to conquer... nothing's worse than a good nap and still lots of chores to tackle.
      4) Don't take a nap before everyone who's supposed to be in the house is actually in the house.
      5) Don't have a yappy dog!!!

      Finally, there are better times and days to take a nap. In fact, there are better times for specific days to nap. You should feel free to nap any day, but there are definitely better times than others. Here's the good.

      1) Rainy Sunday afternoons.... The Academy Awards of napping... Zzzzzzzzzzzzz!
      2) Sunday afternoons between 1p to 2:30pm
      3) Rainy Saturday afternoons... The Emmys.... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz-Light!
      4) Saturday afternoons... 3pm to 3:45pm
      5) Any rainy weekday after lunch.... 12:30 to 1:15pm
      5) Any weekday after lunch... 12:30 to 1:15pm

      Here's the not so good.

      1) Sunny weekend days... Keep 'em short like #2 & #4 above
      2) Any weekday... A brief 'power nap' is okay, but I always feel a lil' guilty 'resting my eyes' on weekdays
      3) Any day before 12:30PM

      Now the question is, how do you feel about a good nap? Try my suggestions.

      Bill Robertson with one last piece of advice. That is, always have a calming memory ready and waiting as soon as you begin to 'rest your eyes.' zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz