Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #31

     Five is the perfect number for Oreos, our neighbor has the most persistent car chaser in the county and Snyder's sold out of jigsaw puzzles, but that's not stopping Teresa.

Aisle Four/The Cookie-Cracker Aisle

     I went to bed last night craving arguably the most popular cookie in America. I'm speaking of the one and only Oreo. I'm talking about the good, old fashioned & original Oreo. Teresa was thinking of a Snickerdoodle.
     Five Oreos is/are the perfect number. Here's my formula: First, I pour a hearty, but short glass of whole milk. The short glass is crucial. I'll explain in a couple of sentences.

Five Oreos & Milk/The Perfect Formula

     Then, I get five Oreos. I eat the first two dry. Then, I individually dunk the next two and that's where the short glass comes into play. A tall, slender glass won't work. But, a short, fat lipped glass is ideal. After my two dunks, I eat the fifth and final Oreo dry. Then, I chug the ice cold milk. Sometimes, I grab a couple more Oreos to eat on the way to bed. But that varies. Once, I woke up with Fudgesicle sticks stuck to my chest. So, variety is okay.

Gabby, The Big White Dog

     Next, meet our neighbor's dog. Her name is Gabby and she might be the most car chasing canine in the county. She's a Great Pyrenees that our neighbors rescued and now she guards their chickens and their road.

     There's not a time that I drive by that Gabby doesn't try her hardest to catch-up. We can see her coming from around the house. She's gotta know that there's absolutely no chance of catching us, but she still chases us at a full gallop. And then, she stops! Gabby's a great road, guard dog. I don't know about the chickens.

Jigsaw Shortage

     We found out today that Snyder and apparently even Amazon is completely sold out of jigsaw puzzles. Sad, but true.
     Teresa and I made a couple stops today looking for a puzzle. Both places were sold out. Teresa went to Amazon, but they're sold out too. The earliest delivery is probably next month, but for a good reason. The Amazon head honchos say it's because they're delivering more essential items before games. Can't fault 'em for that.
     I gave T a challenge. She said she's not going to do it, but she's a competitor. So, I'm going to wait and see. I told her to dismantle her current puzzle, flip all the pieces, shuffle them and then put the puzzle together upside down without pictures to guide her. I think it's genius.

     Gracie Update: She's off her feed. We're not sure if she just doesn't like the 'active' dog food vs puppy chow or if she's got the Epizuda.
     Diet Update: Nathaniel Hawthorne would have a letter for us today.

Bill Robertson (4/17/20,) If I couldn't have Oreos, I think I'd choose Mystic Mints or Chips Ahoy. They're best with milk. T wants a chewy, oatmeal raisin.

Gracie and Me: Covid 19 #30

     I never in my life drank, bought, hoped for or wanted prune juice and Teresa's ashamed to tell me that she's running out of patience with a 300-piece jigsaw puzzle.

Shopping for Seniors/Snyder, TX

     Our local Economic Development Corporation (DCOS) growsnyder.com teamed up with our Senior Center https://www.facebook.com/ScurryCountySeniorCenter/ and United Supermarkets https://local.unitedsupermarkets.com/tx/snyder/3500-college-ave.html to offer free grocery delivery to our seniors. The response hasn't been overwhelming, but steady and that's good. Big smiles are worth millions.
     The rub is that when shopping for seniors I find that we're shopping for items we never dreamed of buying.
     I pride myself in knowing my store, but I'm completely out of my game shopping for seniors. Today, we hunted down diet prune juice, lite Spam, Vienna sausages, three bags of Brachs jelly beans, Zinc and some type of cleaner in a yellow bottle that starts with the letter S. The diet prune juice was a killer. Someone hid the last jug behind the real stuff. We got it all or at least most of it, but I found myself asking for help more times than I can remember.

The Jigsaw Master/Windmill Ranch Preserve

     Next, either boredom's setting in or something. Teresa brought home a jigsaw puzzle. Now, she's got it spread out all over the main, pavilion table.

                           Me: "Ah, how's it going?"
                           Teresa: "Fine. Wanna help?"
                          Me: "No."
                           Teresa: "It's fun. It's challenging my patience and ADD. There's a pretty piece here.                                        There's another there. The New Orleans piece goes here and that's Las Vegas                                         up there!
                          Me: "Are they numbered on the back?"
                          Teresa: "No."
                          Me: "I'm out."

     Gracie update: She ran and played today with Cody's dogs. They all came to the house site today. The three dogs, Gracie, Ace & Micky never stopped.
     Diet update: I bought some lite Spam & pimento cheese..... and some chips.

Bill Robertson, (4/16/20) Our good friend and accountant Ben Murphy says today used to be the best day of his life. Now, he's bummed because it's just another day.

Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #29

     One way aisles are messin' with my grocery store mojo, I'm wondering if Zoom is a verb or a noun and it's hummingbird season at The Windmill Ranch Preserve.
      Our local grocer began the one-way aisles this week and it's really messin' up my shopping and proving that you just can't fix stupid.

One-Way Aisles/Snyder, Texas

     First of all, I've been known to brag about my shopping savvy. I can take my shopping list and NEVER go backwards in the grocery store. Sometimes the dairy aisle throws me a curveball because we're not big dairy people, but otherwise veggies are to the left, bread's on Aisle two, coffee's on Aisle four, etc, etc. But, times have changed and One-Way aisles are proving that people pay zero attention to change... at least in the beginning. Maybe things will change.

Zoom or Zooming?

     Now to the Zoom craze or is it the Zooming craze? Personally, I hate that we have to use it but I really like the technology. Webinars are a drag because it feels so One-Way. I can see them, but they can't see me. On the flip side, the few times that I've used Zoom to connect with family members has been fun, even a little therapeutic. My 40th high school reunion was postponed this year. I wondered today if we could have a Zoom reunion?

Hummer Season/Windmill Ranch-Snyder, TX

     It's spring so it's Hummingbird season. We set up our feeders today. Did you know that you're not supposed to put red dye in the sugar water? It's bad for the bird's digestive system. There are 17-species of Hummingbirds in Texas. We have eight that come all the time and then nine more that visit when they can.

Broad Tailed Hummingbird

     The most popular in west Texas is the Broad Tailed Hummingbird. It's 3.1 to 3.5" in length, weighing 0.1-0.2oz with a wing span of 5.25".
   
     Gracie Update: It finally warmed up enough to get her out for a run.
     Diet Update: We found low carb pasta and low carb tortillas. Can't wait.😔

Bill Robertson (4/15/20,) hot dogs are on Aisle-1, Frozen pizza on Aisle-10, chips on Aisle-7 and bags of Hershey candies on Aisle-4.😏
   

Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #28

     I'm almost paralyzed by fear. I'm genuinely afraid that if I take the first step that I'll soon find myself at or near the point of no return. My issue isn't a C-19 paranoia, although that does weigh on my mind and heart. My issue is a plumbing problem here at the Windmill Ranch Preserve. Our two handle kitchen sink has a persistent drip.

The Dripping Sink/Windmill Ranch Preserve, Snyder TX

     I'm convinced I can fix it myself because I watched three, separate YouTube videos. I feel like a millennial.
     All three videos said; 1) Turn off the water 2) Unscrew the handle (the cold in my case) 3) Unscrew the stem or Bonnet 4) Buy a replacement at the local hardware store 5) Replace stem/Bonnet and handle.

My Tools/Windmill Ranch Preserve

     I'll bet the $1,000,000 I won yesterday in Blog #27 that as easy as the YouTube videos make it sound, it's actually going to be one of the top five frustrating tasks I've ever tackled.
     Seriously, have you ever, as a regular Joe/Jane, tried to take on even the most simple chore in the world of flowing water? I have and it's absolutely miserable. My plan is to plan.
     First, I laid out all my tools. I think I have the proper Phillips head screwdriver. I grabbed two Vice-grips, mostly because I have two Vice-grips. The pliers are on standby. Next, Teresa and I made a schedule. The bottom line is, I'm coming to the ranch tomorrow at 7:00ish. I figure I'll need a lot of time. I'll keep you posted.

     Diet Update: All the ham, potatoes and cool pistachio salad we had yesterday didn't add up to any extra weight. Apparently, I've found the perfect diet. I call it "Eat Only One Meal A Day" diet.
     Gracie Update: She's super needy today.

Bill Robertson (4/13/20), I'm adding the date now just in case anyone WAY in the future looks back.
   

Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #27

     I'll bet $1,000,000 that you've never heard nor seen my next sentence and if you say you have then you're not telling the truth.
     I went to drive-in church, I zoomed with my family and Teresa wanted to know why Tiger was chewing so much gum at The Masters. I think my $1,000,000 is safe.

Calvary Baptist Church/Snyder, TX

     We did go to Drive-In church. The Calvary Baptist Team in Snyder set up two, flatbed trailers on 35th street, one for the band and the other for the singers and the preacher. We all tuned our dials to FM 88.3 for the audio and turned on our flashers to receive Communion "supplies" from mask and glove wearing ushers.

Drive-in Church/Snyder, TX

     It couldn't have gone any better at our 9:00am service. The parking lot was jam packed. I'm pretty sure everyone like myself snuck out of their vehicle to snap a picture on their phone. The absolute best part was instead of exclaiming AMEN after the worship leader or preacher's message.... We all honked our horns and many times. I wonder what the neighborhood folk thought?

Zooming/Windmill Ranch Preserve

     Then thanks to my 'lil sister, Julia, we Zoomed with the Randals, Robertson, Richmond and Mummert gang. Top left is Laura, Norman, Susie & Nate Richmond from the NOLA area. Top middle is Teresa and me from The Windmill Ranch in Snyder, America. Top right is Allison and Jack Robertson from her dad's office in the basement of their new home in Nashville. Center left is Mom (aka Gmom) from her living room on 34th Street here in Snyder. Center, middle is Joe Robertson & Sharon Anderson from their home in Nashville. Center right is Nadia and Zachary Richmond from her family's home. Bottom center is Darrel and Julia Mummert with Mercy and Luke from their home on Vineyard Road in Albuquerque, NM. Not seen, but heard is younger brother Peter from his home, also in Abq., NM.
     The irony of this is... I can tag all of the above but the one person who won't ever see this blog, because she's not on Facebook, is my lil' sister, Julia.

2019 Masters/Teresa Knew the Answer

     And it was one year ago that Teresa asked me, "Why is Tiger chewing so much gum? Has he always chewed gum?"
     We were watching the 2019 Masters. We had it recorded because of Easter Services at our previous church that had a great service and then a fantastic pot luck. Here's what happened.
                            Teresa: "Why is Tiger chewing so much gum? Has he always chewed gum?"
                            Me: "I dunno. Might google it."
                           Teresa: "I think I will."
     Teresa got pretty quiet after that. Come to think of it, she didn't say much for the rest of the tournament. Then, Tiger earned his fifth Masters and the truth came out.
                            Me: "Man! That's was some good golf. Can you believe it?"
                            Teresa: "Yeah. I've know for about three hours."
                            Me: "What? How?"
                            Teresa: "When I googled why Tiger was chewing so much gum, all the articles                                                  showed that he won."
                            Me: "Hmm. Guess you shouldn't ask so many questions."
                            Teresa: "Tell me about it."
     Now, we're both watching Tiger's 2019 Masters win. He's still chewing a lot of gum. Teresa found out he's chewing CBD gum and so was Phil. We also BOTH know that he wins in the end and it's still really good golf.

     Diet Update: It's a holiday. We're breaking every rule.... a lot!
     Gracie Update: Big storms last night gave her a scare, but she's back to her old self this afternoon.

Bill Robertson, I'm making my world famous Bleu Cheese mashed potatoes.

Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #26

     This is Good Friday and the a napkin is the clue. A retired preacher's wife, who we know, shared an enlightening explanation as to why Mary Magdalene, John and Simon Peter discovered a folded linen cloth inside Jesus' tomb on Easter morning.

The Napkin

      So, Mary showed up at Jesus' tomb on Sunday morning. The big rock closing tomb had been rolled or pushed out of the way. She peaked in & saw Jesus' body was gone. She didn't go into the tomb. She ran and got John and Simon Peter. John wrote all this down in his gospel.
     John says he was faster. So, he got to the tomb before Simon Peter, but he didn't go inside the vault. Then, Peter ran up. He looked in and went inside the tomb. That's when they all noticed that the linen cloth covering Jesus' head was neatly folded where his head would have been. So, what's a neatly folded piece of linen or, in 21st language, a simple napkin to tell us in 2021?

The Neatly Folded Napkin

     Here's the information shared by the retired pastor's wife.Hebrew tradition was very simple 2,000 years ago. The master ate. The servant waited out of sight. If the master got up from the table and just tossed the napkin next to his plate, that meant he was done. But, if the master got up and neatly folded his napkin, then HE WASN'T DONE.
     The significance of the neatly folded linen in the tomb is... HE'S NOT DONE!

     Diet and Gracie Update... Maybe later.

Bill Robertson, Happy Easter all!
   

Gracie and Me: Covid-19 #25

     This is Masters week and I made low-fat turkey, Mexican wantons. One of those is almost a joke. The other is a joke, but there's absolutely no connection to either.
     This week is the Holy Grail of golf, and like every other professional sport, it's been canceled/postponed for this year. So, what's an official golf nut like myself to do? Build his own golf course, of course.

Windmill Ranch Golf Club/Snyder, TX

     I was already mowing. So, I decided to cut three more areas a little 'tighter' to create a three hole, Par 3 course. Play it three times and you play nine holes. It's one club, executive golf.
     To be clear, it's not really three holes because there are no holes because there are no greens. The three holes total 155 yards. When you multiply that times three, the newly opened Windmill Ranch Golf Club measures a whopping 465 yards, but with a lot of 'trouble' if you hit your tee shot too short.

Hole #1/Windmill Ranch Golf Club, Snyder TX

     Today wasn't a picture perfect day for golf, but I played a round anyway in honor of opening day for The Masters. The temp was in the mid 60s with a slight north breeze and occasional rain showers. The weather really didn't affect my pace of play.
     Hole #1, #4 and #7 measures 38 yards. The carry over the rough/natural area is approximately 20-yards. So as you can imagine, you gotta drop the ball almost straight down on the stake which serves as our course pin placement.

Hole #2/Windmill Ranch Golf Club, Snyder TX

     Hole #2, #5 and #8 measures 55-yards. Hazards include banging it off one of our "tents" to the right or pulling it left into the 12"-15" natural area. The north cross wind today really didn't affect my ball flight too much. I did wipe down my grip due to the drizzle.

Hole #3/Windmill Ranch Golf Club, Snyder TX

     Hole #3, #6 and #9 is the hardest. It measures about 62-yards and it's all carry. If you don't clear the natural area, it's a blow-up hole.
     I'm flirting with starting 1,2, & 3 and then going backwards. But that'd make #3 #4, #2 #5 and #1 #6. Then if I reversed again, that'd make #1 or #3 #6, #2 or #5 #8 and #3 or #6 #9. I'm not sure I could keep score.
     By the way, I started with three balls and lost two to the Open Championship like rough. But, I walked the whole course. I haven't done that since playing with Ken Simek and Deb Collins in Lincoln, NE circa 1997-2000(ish).

Low fat, turkey Mexican wantons

     Diet update: We're having Mexican turkey salad tonight. It's mostly lettuce. Then, I took the leftovers and made low fat, turkey Mexican wantons. After that, I decided that when I open my "Bill's Chinese House," I'm going to charge $5.00 per wanton because they're a big pain in the A&#!
     Gracie update: She loved going to the golf course with me before C-19. She's a dog so she doesn't know the difference between a real course and The Windmill Ranch course. She just sees the club and the white balls and gets excited.

Bill Robertson, My tee boxes are cut on a three, my fairways are on a four and my greens are on a five. My holes are wooden stakes leftover from staking our home.